Sleep Tight by Laura Marie Altom

I’m not really sure why I do this to myself. I called my friend who works in a used bookshop and asked her to pick me out a couple of books. She asked what I wanted and the only thing I could tell her was that I wanted something evil. One should never leave an opening that big for trouble. Especially since one of the two books she picked for me was a romance novel.

Sleep Tight by Laura Marie Altom… Bah! What an evil book. Occasionally I like to read a Harlequin, get it out of my system which is a throw back to the days when I lived at home. My mother had a closet full of those books and I never had to pay for a single one of them. My aunts provided the crack and for some reason, my mother collected them, even though she didn’t read them all that much. And me, who will read anything with words on it, read a bunch of them. I really don’t think that was a very good idea to expose a young mind to such questionable material.

Anyhow, back to the evil book. First we have a down-on-her-luck Tooth Fairy who pretends to be a hired Bugoslavian princess to make some extra cash. Next, we have a budding Boogeyman who thinks his mother is being conned by this faux-princess and kidnaps her to his in-the-middle-of-nowhere rustic family farm. The farm is so rustic, it doesn’t have indoor plumbing. (I am so not making any of this up.) The first half of the book is spent with them bickering and fighting and of course, the fighting of the sexual tension. Not to mention, she is an exceptional homemaker and completely turns the little rundown home into something nice and homey while he is out plowing the fields the old fashioned way. (Metaphor? Who’s to say.) So basically, the first half of the book causes a little bit of eye rolling but it is holding pretty close to the general formula. (And for the record, I have no problems with the formula. It is loved by millions for a reason.)

And then wham, I was completely taken by surprise when it turns into an interesting fantasy novel. Yeah, I know, stupid me. Tooth fairy, boogeyman; you would think that would be enough to tip me off. As our hero is being taken over more and more by his dark side, he forces himself to pull away from his innocent angel, the symbol of goodness and light in the world. He cannot allow the bad voice in his head to hurt her. The angst dripping off these pages is enough to give Angel pause and gawd, how I love angst. (Not really sure why cause I can’t imagine putting up with it in real life.)

And then secrets are revealed about him and then about her and you are not really sure what is going to happen and the world could come to an end because of the evil lord of the Underworld and... And what does the author do? Wave a magic wand so I freaking hate the ending. She killed it. Why couldn’t she write a real fantasy novel that allowed her have a messy ending? That allowed her to create something with real meaning? Nope. That is why this book is evil and my friend had no idea when she passed it off to me. It looked innocent but it was so very, very deceiving.

The second book holding to the theme of evil was Adultery for Adults and yep, I bought that one too. Not that I have any plans to go in that direction but I’m exceedingly interested in finding out what advice someone might have for the adulterer in the 1960’s.

A Complicated Kindess by Miriam Toews

Bah!

Bah, I say!

I really have nothing to say about this one … other than a little bit that has vexed me. So to get to that part, I'll have to write enough of a bridge to get us to where we can legitimately talk about me. 'Cause you see, it is all about me. This whole exercise, just me.

Anywho … A Complicated Kindness by Miriam Toews is about this poor Canadian girl, Nomi, growing up in a Mennonite community that gives new meaning to the word repression. It is the type of community that if you do something that upsets the elders, you could find yourself shunned. Basically, you become a ghost, no one can talk to you, can't even eat at the same table as a shunned family member. Nomi's sister and mother left when she was younger and it is only her and her father left to struggle out a life together. You can't blame her for not being all that motivated with her schoolwork when the only future you see for yourself is at the chicken processing plant.

Every character is depressed or unhappy in some form or another. Not a happy story in the lot of them. That didn't make me all that motivated to read this one very fast because it was way too easy to get sucked into the world of the walking despondent. I didn't completely hate it but was glad when it was over. It was sort of like Catcher in the Rye but without the happy ending.

Now we can talk about me and the vexing. You see, I finished the book last weekend and then went to work and told a coworker. (Yep, this is another book club selection.) We started talking about it and I mentioned the ending and how it was sad about ________. I won't give it away here in case you haven't read it. But then, apparently, even if you had read it, you don't see that either. So now, we start taking a poll and it turns out that I'm the only one to get this impression out of the turn of events. (One woman even patted me on the shoulder and said, "Figures you would find the morbid angle." But thanked me for making the book more interesting for her.)

Now I'm starting to think I'm just crazy, which could be true or a potential side effect of this book. I don't know. If you have read it please email me so I can get your take on it. This could be another case of me reading into something that really isn't there or it really did happen and I'm not so nuts.

Bah!

Walk of Fame by Sharon Krum

Well, it has been awhile since I've sat down to write a review. Most of the blame goes to taking a little break from reading (a collective gasp can be heard from my to-be-read shelf on my right…) but not really. Mostly spending my reading time on stuff I get off the net. There is something comforting reading via my computer screen. If more books were electronic, I wonder if I would be more apt to read them. I suppose it would depend a lot on the price. Just the other day I was wondering if environmental concerns will ever cause books to go digital…. This is so not the reason why I'm sitting here right now so I guess I should get on with it…

Walk of Fame by Sharon Krum is next on the review block. Another book borrowed from a friend at work. She told me about it and it sounded like it had an interesting premise so I figured I should read it. I borrow way too many books (another gasp from the right, this time distinctly sarcastic. Oh shuddap!) It is about this guy, who has been hired by a magazine to stage some stunt, all in the hopes of gaining fame, and then write about the experience. The whole idea is that you don't really have to be special to be famous, you just have to do something stupid and the public will eat it up with a spoon. In comes Alexandra West, Hollywood starlet who wants to make over her image. She agrees to date him in order to be seen as someone who can attract a smart man and he gets to become known as Alexandra's boyfriend all in the name of social experiment.

Well, it turns into one big snowball from hell and yes, I know that metaphor makes no sense whatsoever. Basically, from one little date, his life gets taken over by the media machine. Being famous has some perks but mostly a lot of not-so-great moments like how this is affecting his relationship with his best friend since second grade, Jake. Even though he was able to forgive Jake for stealing his wife, Jake can't seem deal well with the situation.

It was an okay book, slow in some parts but entertaining. I guess the whole moral of the story is to be careful what you wish for because while you might not change, if people's perception of you does, look out cause that is what will rock your world. Not sure if I'd recommend it but I thought it would make an interesting movie.

Derik's Bane by MaryJanice Davidson

Derik's Bane is by MaryJanice Davidson, whom you might remember from the Dead and Unwed and Dead and Unemployed books. Those books where really, really funny. Derik's Bane is funny as well but not everything I wanted it to be.

Derik is a member of the Wyndham werewolf pack and just recently turned alpha. In this reality, packs can only have one alpha at a time. Sometimes, a wolf will turn alpha for no apparent reason. This will lead to either the wolf leaving the pack or a fight to the death for dominance. Michael, the current alpha, is Derik's oldest friend and understandably Derik doesn't want to kill him. In comes the pack's seer. She gets a vision that the world is going to end in a week if Derik doesn't get out there and do something about it. He has to go to California to meet up with Dr. Sara Gunn (PhD in Nursing) because she is the reincarnation of sorceress Morgan Le Fay and the reason behind the earth's destruction. They meet up and go on a road trip to save humanity. Not surprisingly, love is found on the way.

I had some problems with the book. The chapters were too bloody short. A book that is only 298 pages shouldn't be broken up into over 30 chapters. You know, you can combine parts, especially if all the author is doing is jumping to another character's point of view of the same scene. A good way to do this is just leave a couple of blank lines and then have at it. I find it a little jarring always starting a new chapter, especially a book I finished in one night.

Another problem is that all the characters are bloody beautiful and of course, they don't know it. You know, this really gives the beautiful people a bad reputation for being dumb. At least write characters with some self-awareness. Otherwise, it starts to reek of a Danielle Steele heroine.

One last problem and I promise this is the last one I will bitch about tonight. I found that it was all surface and no depth. But then, I'm not sure if that is really a problem of the book or not. Part of the problem is that after reading the last HP novel, which has 6 books worth of depth, it is hard for any other book to compete. The deal is, MaryJanice has created a really cool werewolf world but we don't get to experience. I want to really get into it and feel like I'm a fly on the wall, experiencing their customs, getting to know what it is that makes this pack tick. We don't really get to see as much as I wanted and that left me feeling a little frustrated (and not in a good way ...)

MaryJanice writes great dialogue but it could have used little more angst. It is a good summer read, light, fluffy, sexy, funny, etc. Just don't go into it thinking you will get any more than that.

"The Yellow Wallpaper" by Charlotte Perkins Gilman

"The Yellow Wallpaper" is a short story by Charlotte Perkins Gilman. Normally I wouldn't write an InCoHerEnt review of short stories but I'm bored and this one has a little story.

My parents moved into a new house and it needed a lot of renovating. They worked one whole summer throwing out junk, tearing off wallpaper, painting, re-wallpapering, refinishing the hardwood floors. Lots of work. And it does look nice now that they have it done. But I'm not a big fan of their choice of wallpaper in the guest bedroom. It looks like a meadow puked all over it... and that meadow had very, very tiny flowers. Basically, it has these green vines, or stems, and these little dark blue flowers. If you stare at the wall long enough, it looks like the wall is moving and you will get nicely dizzy. It doesn't seem to have a pattern that you can focus on so you end up just feeling a little seasick after a bad acid trip. You wonder that if you stare long enough at it, you might get lucky enough to see a 3D image like a sailboat in one of those posters from the mall, but it never comes through. Messes with the head, it does. (And I have learned to never make fun of the wallpaper as Mother seems to love it and will take offense.)

Anyway, a friend of mine came over the other day and she got to experience the psychedelic fun of the guest room which is really my room as I am the only one to visit. She told me about this story and she dared me to read it in there. And boy, did that add an interesting effect to the story.

"The Yellow Wallpaper" is about a woman, an author, who is sick and is made to rest in this room to recuperate. She is not allowed to write and all she is has to focus on is this horrible yellow wallpaper. They are only going to be there for three months which is not long enough to go to the expense of re-wallpapering. She starts seeing something in the paper that starts moving and then that something seems to be able to escape the paper and creep along outside during the day. At night, that something looks like it is trying to escape.

Very creepy story. Very good. One of those American classics that everyone should read. (Go here if you want to read more about Charlotte Perkins Gilman.) It reminded me a lot of The Hours, it had the same tension, not sure who was going to die, the same feelings that make me think of depression. Reading it in the crazy wallpapered room and the effect of the story left me feeling a little woozy. Not sure if I'll do that again but I will read the story again. Very cool.

The Red Tent by Anita Diamant

Anywho, the poor book The Red Tent by Anita Diamant is the next book to be given the InCoHerEnt treatment. Again, this is another book I wouldn't normally pick out for myself. (A theme you might notice with about half of the books I read.) A woman at work lent it to me with the words, "Take all the time you need to read it. No hurries." That was said close to a year ago now and I was getting to the point of having to read it or give it back unread. Truthfully, I would rather sit through a book I hate then give one back that I've borrowed and not read. Easier to say that it wasn't my thing than to look like I didn't even try.

But I've finished it and the last third was the hardest to get through. Not that it was a difficult read by any means. The book was broken up into three parts all told from the point of view of Dinah, Leah's daughter. Leah was the first wife of Jacob who was the son of Rebecca and Isaac and grandson of Abram. Those names will only mean anything to you if you are familiar to the Old Testament. I thought I knew the Old Testament but to be honest, that is only from bible stories that were safe to be told in Sunday School class. There are some good stories in there if you can get past the not so fun stuff. But I digress, this is not a critical review of the Bible and I use the term "critical review" loosely.

The first part of the book is dedicated to Dinah's mother and her aunts or Jacob's other wives (four of them in total.) Basically their story is of how Jacob shows up and falls for Rachel, ends up marrying Leah instead and then marrying Rachel afterwards. Then he also gets the other two sisters out of the deal as well. Leah and Rachel sort of have this sibling/wife rivalry thing going on which is quite interesting to read. Jacob, with his many wives, has many sons. The problem with sons is that they can help in the fields but they are not much help with the domestic stuff like cooking for all those men or weaving or whatever. Having sons is a burden on a woman. (Just ask my mother. Can she get my brother to clean a dish? I don't think so and ever since he moved back in, that is all I hear about.) But at long last, here comes Dinah to be the daughter long hoped for by Leah, Rachel, Zilpah, and Bilhah.

The second part of the book is Dinah's story as she grows up. She acts as witness to the going ons of her clan and mysteries of the Red Tent. Normally only those who have their monthlies are permitted into the tent but as only daughter she is allowed to witness the rituals that take place in there. She is present for births and learn the secrets of the midwife.

The third part of the story takes place after Dinah leaves her home for Egypt. I won't get into the details here as to why she leaves for Egypt because I don't want to ruin the last interesting thing that happens in this book. I think the problem with third part is that it looses its two most interesting characters Rachel and Leah. The first two parts are almost completely about them and their dynamic with Jacob. That was interesting. Then Dinah leaves for Egypt and I suddenly don't care anymore. The third part just felt like a really long conclusion that neatly ties up all the strings.

Another problem that I have with the book is that it floats in very middle ground. It could have been really nice and sordid but it never goes there. Or it could have been an interesting (but less read) nonfictional study of the role and lives of women in whatever B.C. Nope, don't really get that either cause its all fiction.

I thought the first two parts of the book were a good read. After that, I didn't care. The thing is, it isn't as if there were any information in Genesis 34 as to what type of person Dinah was. She could have been far more interesting although I have to give her props for the curses she brought down on evil men. I like my main characters written to dare me to dislike them as much as I love them. You don't get that here.

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince by JK Rowling

So, I'm sitting here and watching the time tick away on my hour limit for writing this thing. You see, you can only InCoHerEntLy review something if it only takes an hour to write it. If you spend any more time on it, you risk actually making interesting points and people might start to think that you care.

Perhaps that is why this one is so hard to write. I care a little too much about the HP world. (She says choking on the understatement and hoping that you don't notice all the HP stuff that is littered throughout.) I knew that whoever died, it would hurt. And hurt it did. I'm not going to get into spoilers or describing the plot or whatever. If you wanted that you can read a hell of a lot of reviews that are already out there. I guess I'll just have to focus on how I feel about the book after finishing it and you can look elsewhere for all that other stuff.

The best way I can feel about the book is indescribable at this point.. First came the physical reaction of horror. Then a lot of confusion. Followed closely by numbness tinged with a little bit of anxiety. That one stayed with me all Friday night, literally. (Only got about an hour sleep that night because I had to be out of bed by 5am to wait in line for Harvest Jazz and Blues tickets.) That whole night was spent trying to come to terms with what had happened and coming up with a possible theory that would allow me to live with it. I think I've got something that I'm going to stick with until the next one comes out. Not going to tell you what it is but just know that it is likely close to a lot of other people's theories floating out there.

I would also like it to be noted that I didn't cry. You knew someone was going to die so you just have to prepare yourself for something like that. But to be honest, the very last page made me cry a bit, it was very touching.

JK Rowling is evil. .... But in a good way ... damn it.

This review takes the word InCoHerEnt to a whole new level. Ultimately, I liked it. The last three chapters were really, really dark. I appreciate dark. We get to see how much Harry is growing as a person. Even though some have complained that it is too long, I'm of the camp that wants more detail. I want the War and Peace of the wizarding world and thought it was too short. Someday, we might get the encyclopedia JKR might write and hopefully it will be unbelievably long.

Coraline by Neil Gaiman

Another one bites the dust. But this time, it isn't completely my fault as I'm usually not this fast of a reader. Coraline is only about 160-some pages long and it is intended for a younger audience. But it was written by Neil Gaiman so for that reason alone I say that it should be on everyone's reading list.

Coraline is about a little girl named ... well, you know. She is at that point of summer break where you have read all the books, watched all the TV you can stand and even outside adventure doesn't hold the same fascination. Her new neighbors are odd and she suspects, a little crazy. One afternoon, she discovers a door that opens up to a brick wall. Later, when she opens it again, it leads to another apartment just like her own with an Other Mother and an Other Father. They want her to stay and be their little girl. They will love her, play with her and give her everything she ever wanted. When Coraline says no, the Other Mother parent-naps her real parents and she now has to fight to free them and herself from the evil woman's clutches.

This book was so cool. It had moments that were so super creepy that I couldn't imagine reading it to any kid under the age of 12. There were also moments so beautiful and engaging that make you want to read it over and over again. Coraline as a character rang very true to me. She was a smart kid but with a few bratty tendencies and I don't mean that in a bad way. It is just the natural way they deal with the whole growing up situation we were all forced to go through. Any kid that is written all saccharine, charming and self-sacrificing has not spent enough time around children. Plus it had a cool cat. I've been around so many dog people for so long that I'd forgotten how cool cats can be. (I really should revisit my Tanya Huff books.)

Anyway, as you can tell, I liked it. Loved it. Highly recommend to everyone. Some younger kids might find it scary but if they can read Harry Potter, they will have no problems with this one.

The Jane Austen Book Club by Karen Joy Fowler

I really didn't think I'd be setting down to write another review so soon. Yesterday, my apartment was unblessedly hot and it was the perfect excuse to be lazy. Nothing is nicer than spending an afternoon with a book and only pausing to make passion fruit snow cones to help keep cool. I also paused here and there to do a few chores but only enough to keep myself from feeling too guilty over my idleness.

Anyway, yesterday's book was The Jane Austen Book Club by Karen Joy Fowler. Now this isn't exactly something I'd pick out for myself to read normally. But it was the next selection for my work book club and we needed something lighter after The Kite Runner (extremely excellent book that should be required reading for anyone who can read.) The Jane Austen Book Club is about a group of women and one guy who get together to discuss…. wait for it… wait for it… can you guess?... the books by Jane Austen. (Yeah, the heat is getting to my so-called sense of humour.) Anywho, the book is broken up in six chapters and each chapter focuses on the character who is the one hosting that month's meeting. We get to learn about that person's past, their present and what problems are currently vexing them at the moment with a general sense of Austen sprinkled in the air.

I like Jane Austen even though I can only claim to have read one of her books (Pride and Prejudice) but I've seen the movies which is a help when reading this book. Otherwise, I would have hated it. We don't get to feel like we really get to know the members of the book club. We don't get to understand why they make the decisions they do. But it does raise some interesting questions about marriage and some of the reasons why people marry or not. For me, the greatest literary mystery is why Charlotte marries Mr. Collins in P&P. Here, a theory is given that perhaps Charlotte was gay and therefore didn't want to hold out for something better. As theories go, it isn't too bad and so far the best explanation as to why she would enter a marriage with the man that never ceases to grate on my nerves.

I didn't hate it. I found it a little too predictable and to be honest, I enjoyed Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants more as an entertaining summer read. But if you love Jane Austen, you should give it a try and let me know how you felt about it. I just ended up feeling a little blah. (So blah that I can't even muster much snark for this review.) Enjoyed it while I was reading it but once it gets placed on the bookshelf, I doubt I'll think about it much after that. Which is annoying, I'll have to reread before my book club meets to come up with some insightful remarks.

Dead to the World by Charlaine Harris

Just finished Dead to the World by Charlaine Harris. Another Sookie Stackhouse book from her Dead series. Sookie, poor girl, is telepathic and lives in a small characteristic Southern town. This one focuses a lot on Eric, the vampire... now that Sookie has broken up with Bill, the vampire, she is a single woman who finds that she's missing the sex. Eric, found along side the road without any memory of who he is, hides out at Sookie's for protection from the witches who did this to him. Then Sookie's brother goes missing which is another major mystery... is it connected to Eric's brain mishap? I can't tell you! You will have to read it to find out.

That is a horribly written summary of a book I actually enjoyed. For me, it is like brain candy... except the good kind of candy that doesn't add pounds to your butt. But this was a nice read, not too angsty, not too heavy. Sookie isn't like another heroine of vamp books who spends half of the plot justifying her decisions that make her come off as a borderline sociopath while the other half is spent surrounded by the most beautiful men in the universe. (It is the men part that make me feel less sympathetic to that character.) Sookie seems alone most of the time... she is the one who has to go beyond the call of duty but always without crossing the line to superhuman. She doesn't have ever-escalating special powers that make you wonder if putting her out of her misery wouldn't be a gift to humanity. (Maybe I'm too mean.) Sookie seems to have a soul that is bothered by the same things we are all troubled by... except she gets to play with vamps, weres, shifters... etc.

Anyway... I enjoyed and recommend.